Mogel, W. (2010) The Blessing of a B Minus: Using Jewish Teachings to Raise Resilient Teenagers. Scribner – A division of Simon & Schuster, New York.
Following on the success of her The Blessings of a Skinned Knee, Dr Wendy Mogel has written this companion work, aimed at helping parents understand the “strange fruit” that many parents discover now occupy the rooms that used to be inhabited by their easy to understand and easier to manage younger children.
Written in the same humorous, non-judgmental style that typifies Mogel’s work, The Blessings of a B Minus gently walks parents and teachers through the minefield that is often adolescence. The chapter titles give a clear understanding that Mogel has ‘been there and done that’ as they range from “Living Graciously with the Chronically Rude” and “The Real Lessons of Homework, Chores and Jobs” to “Letting Your Teen Learn from Bad Judgment and Stressful Situations” and “The Courage to Let Them Go”.
Mogel, herself a clinical psychologist based in Los Angeles, provides consistent advice in terms of helping parents to see the world through the eyes of their teenagers, while setting ground rules that both sides need to keep firmly in place. The text is infused with lightly referenced Jewish sources as Mogel uses the quotations from the Torah, Maimonides and the occasional Jewish Humour pages to inform and illuminate her work. While in no way a religious text, Mogel shows that a reading of these texts can provide a solid foundation for dealing with both age old and modern challenges.
I know that I enjoyed Chapter Four which gives its name to this text. All too often one meets parents who are not able to stand back and allow their children to get a B minus! Or, even worse, to take the consequence for not doing something and “fail” – which Mogel equates with getting a B minus! All too often one meets teenagers who don’t know how to hear the word “no” – and Mogel’s text gently guides parents through scripted conversations that might just make these transitions easier and might just make these “failures” bearable!
Without trivialising matters that are all too real to our teenagers and to us, The Blessing of a B Minus recasts life’s journey into a manageable, exciting and absolutely worthwhile activity. Which we all know that it is!
Frank Samuels
Principal
Bnei Akiva Schools of Toronto